Jail

So I went to jail yesterday. Well, I suppose I went to "a" jail yesterday. It was a very interesting experience. I have a friend in jail for 2 counts of probation violation. I don't know what exactly he did except that he lied to his PO about where he had been. His PO is recommending 10 years incarceration. When he told me about the 10 years possibility, I was pretty much speechless.

This whole experience has been pretty hard for me internally. I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about it or what I'm supposed to do. What he is on probation for is revolting. The thing is...I didn't know about it until we had been friends for quite a while. At the point that he told me, he had already been convicted, sentenced, had served his time, and had been out for a couple years. He's the kind of guy that is at church every Sunday and always helping. He's always the one setting up or stacking chairs or doing dishes after church activities. He was going to counseling and had been doing so well for so long. I'm so mad at him! Why did he have to go and screw it all up?

So I was telling a friend "TW" (who doesn't know jailbird) about it the other day. He made me feel really bad about my friendship with jailbird. He made me feel like I was betraying the world by caring about him. He said my friendship with him condoned his past behavior. So my question is this...Who deserves to be loved? What mistakes preclude you from being cared about? And who am I to make that choice? Also, is it really promoting societal good to ostracize people like him?

Well, the day after I had the conversation with TW, I went to the LDS Relief Society General Broadcast. The whole meeting was on charity and being an instrument in the hands of God. So this is the conclusion I came to...

It is the place of all of us to judge. Not to judge people, but to judge whether their influence in our lives is good or whether their behavior should be patterned. However, it is not our place to punish. That is left up to the justice system and God. What God expects of each of us is to love each other and build each other up. Jailbird has made some very serious mistakes in his life, but he has not surrendered his place as a son of God. If I make mistakes, Christ's love for me does not condone my mistakes, but encourages me to become better. Has Christ abandoned jailbird because of his mistakes? NO. If I am to pattern my life after Christ, then why should I abandon KC now? Hopefully my friendship will improve his life, so why should I not offer it to him?

So what I have to say to TW is...while I understand why you have the feelings you do, I politely decline to take your advice and hope that as I go through this life, continuing to make mistakes, that others will continue to love me.